Wednesday 21 March 2018

Quick Write story


Hi today I will be writing a short story for you also known as a quick write.
We are given the sentence starter and we have to carry it on.  

The waves crashed on the... 
sand sending bits of sand flying. The sand was hot and the sun beamed down on me as I swam deeper and deeper into the ocean. I was neck deep when the earth began to shake. I heard screaming but I couldn't swim in, the current was too strong. I got sucked out so far I couldn't see the people on the beach.  After a minute, the earth stop shaking. I tried to swim in again but the current was too strong. I kept getting sucked out deeper and deeper. I was exhausted.  I looked down into the water.  All the feeling of tiredness and pain disappeared. Instead, it was replaced with fear. There they were circling below me. SHARKS!!!



I hope you liked my quick write please feel free to leave me comments and feedback on how I could improve on my writing. 

3 comments:

  1. Wow. I could feel the fear! Well written C. Dad

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  2. Hope that never actually happens to you Carys! Scary stuff, gripping! mum

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  3. Hi Carys, I really enjoyed our discussion around this piece of writing and I know you learnt some new editing/revising tips. Remember about using different sentence structures for effect - it helps bring your writing to life!

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